Going on vacation is amazing, am I right? When else can you schedule day after day of exciting and exhilarating experiences? But, what if you are going on vacation with another family? Can it be just as exciting and exhilarating?
It seems like adding some of your favorite people, whether extended family or friends, would make for an even better experience, right?
Not always . . .
Relationships can get fractured and crumble right before your eyes.
But, if you know these 8 secrets for going on vacation with other families, you can avoid the heartache and regret. And yes, your vacation can be even more exciting and memorable by adding other families-whether extended family or friends.
We took a trip to California and as a self-proclaimed adrenaline junkie “wanna be,” I loved all of the rides and attractions just as much as my kids.
I was even more excited about this trip this because some of my family was joining us. We combined families and rented a home for a week. A fabulous home with themed bedrooms, rock slide and pool, mini putt-putt course, kids’ playhouse, and an outdoor kitchen. Since we are from Texas, the mild weather of California was literally a breath of fresh air (I mean it is easier to breathe when the air is not saturated with humidity).
The trip left us all with wonderful memories that we will treasure. You may be shocked by that statement because I know a lot of vacations that involve multiple family households can end in disaster and fractured relationships.
That is why it is so important for you to follow some key rules for vacationing with other families.
1. Meet and discuss expectations, habits, and deal-breakers before the trip.
2. Decide ahead of time that it is okay for families to split up and go separate directions sometimes.
3. Respect each person’s personality and perspectives.
4. Make all of your actions and words come from a place of good intention.
5. Have a forgiving heart
6. Make sure that each family has a space to retreat to when emotions run high.
7. Schedule down time
8. Expect Imperfection
1. Meet and discuss expectations, habits, and deal-breakers before the trip.
Everyone has a different “way” they like to vacation. Some want to lay on the beach while kids play in the sand, while others want to have activities planned back to back. There is no “wrong” way to vacation. Personalities are unique and when spending your hard-earned money, it is even more important that you feel like you get what you want out of the trip.
Some people may like to shop and buy souvenirs on a trip and that makes it memorable for them. Others, would rather spend their money on experiences like a helicopter ride, zip-lining, or renting a boat. And still others may simply enjoy sight-seeing. Most families have a combination of these, but preferences will differ. Enjoy the way you like to and keep from judging how others enjoy their vacations.
2. Decide ahead of time that it is okay for families to split up and go separate directions sometimes.
Of course, you are probably taking a multi-family vacation because you want to experience awesome stuff with people who are special to you. There will be plenty of opportunities to do things together when going on vacation with another family. But, no one should expect everyone to do everything together. You want to keep everyone from feeling “bossed around” or forced to do things they do not want to.
3. Respect each other’s personalities and perspectives.
We all have our strengths and our weaknesses. Actively choose to love each other for all of the good things but also for the not so good things. Do your best to consider how your actions and decisions will make others feel. And, remember you are just as “imperfect” as the next person.
4. Make all of your actions and words come from a place of good intention.
Even when you try your best, you can still offend or hurt another. My husband always says, “say what you mean and mean what you say.” Don’t allow yourself to make comments or jokes that are passive aggressive and think that will make your point. People appreciate honesty. I always say, “If I am acting like a b***, I would rather you call me out on it then let it fester inside until one day you explode.
5. Have a forgiving heart
Going on vacation is exciting but it can also be exhausting. Exhaustion can incite meltdowns-not just for kids. As adults, we too can get snappy and super emotional when tired.
Also, you have to remember that you are used to day to day living with the people under your roof. What works for one household may not work for another.
But, on vacation when sharing a rental space you are bringing different households together where there is no escape—which leads me to the next rule.
6. Make sure that each family has a space to retreat to when emotions run high.
When choosing a rental to share, find something that allows each family to have their own space. Being under one roof can be tough, but giving each other space can sometimes save everyone’s sanity.
7. Schedule down time
This mainly applies for those vacations where you are trying to experience many activities and places. If you are visiting a theme park, break up the time you spend in the parks. Go back to the rental for a break or nap.
After a day of traveling to your destination with kids and several family members, and possible time zone changes, you may need to leave the first day of your vacation low-key instead of hitting the ground running.
This was extremely important the time we traveled to Colorado. Coming from Houston on a flight that just lasts a few hours and immediately landing and driving to a place of several thousand feet difference in altitude can really put a damper on your vacation when you experience altitude sickness. We experienced this first hand when our son ended up in the emergency room of the first few days of our vacation. He missed zip-lining (which was amazing)!
8. Expect Imperfection
We know that even ”the best laid plans of mice and men can often go awry.” (Robert Burns, To A Mouse). Something, if not some things, will inevitably go wrong during your amazing vacation. It’s kinda like a wedding—you have to expect that something will go wrong so that it doesn’t throw you for a loop when it does. Use this imperfection to help you grow in your relationship and your own self-awareness. You can at least learn from your experience.
If you stick to these secrets for going on vacation with other families, you will make some of the most amazing memories with the special people in your life. It may come with trials, but if you are willing to put in the effort, you will end up with some treasures of a lifetime.
Have you ever taken a multi-family vacation? How did it go?
